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Bump When Your Wife is a ***** Thread

  • Dirk Hardpeck said...

    OK, gotta vent. The wife and I are looking to buy a house. On Saturday, she took me to see a house that she liked when she saw it with our agent earlier in the week (I was out of town for work). Long story short, I didn't like a single thing about the house. I explained why in a reasonable way. She accused me of not really wanting to get a house, said that we aren't on the same page, that I don't know what I want in a house, that I'm not willing to put in work on a house that we buy and that she isn't going to look at any houses, she'll leave it up to me to find something and she will tell me if she likes it.

    On Sunday sometime in the mid-afternoon, she was napping (or so I thought, she was just resting her eyes even when I came into the room several times) with our 4 month old. I had some books that I had special ordered at the bookstore to pick up. The bookstore is next to the grocery. I got the books and stopped at the grocery to pick up stuff for lunch for the week and a couple other items I knew we were low on. I get back after 40 minutes. She's upset because I didn't leave a note. OK, should have left a note, but we both have cell phones, she can reach me wherever I am. She asks where I was, I tell her. She asks if I picked up stuff for dinner, I said no. She flips, calls me selfish and says I don't ever think of anybody but myself. I tell her I'm sorry and that I'm happy to go back to the store, it's 5 minutes away. She says that's real efficient. I go to play with our daughter, she comes up a minute later and says she's leaving (she's obviously still pissed). Doesn't say where she's going and won't answer when I ask if she fed our daughter while I was gone.

    While she's gone, I go for a 30 minute walk with the baby and our dog. Go to the store for dinner stuff, feed the baby, and start dinner. She comes back 2 hours later and is giving me the cold shoulder. I'm just keeping my head down and trying to avoid her wrath. Eventually, after dinner she says she over-reacted. Doesn't really apologize.

    Yesterday, she brought up the house again, said I'm just not willing to put work into a house but she is. But she did apologize for her reaction on Sunday.

    I figure today she should hit on something about me being selfish. And around we go.

    who did she go blow?

    Brodson ●

  • Brodson said...

    who did she go blow?

    shrug Whoever it was she was probably picturing that diver from Great Britain that looks like he's 16.

    I am afraid that the whole world is closer to moral foreclosure.

    Dirk Hardpeck

  • I'm really down right now.

    I don't usually have these or any "feelings" so I'm struggling. Struggling like Blanch in a 4th year English class.

    The depth of my wife's selfishness and craziness has come even further to light of late.

    Marriage is like flying with kids, if the flight had 500 connections, never ended, Ted Striker were your pilot and you ate the fish.

    Pylon St8ofmind ●

  • Pylon St8ofmind said...

    I'm really down right now.

    I don't usually have these or any "feelings" so I'm struggling. Struggling like Blanch in a 4th year English class.

    The depth of my wife's selfishness and craziness has come even further to light of late.

    Oh do tell

    xGASMANx

  • Pylon St8ofmind said...

    I'm really down right now.

    I don't usually have these or any "feelings" so I'm struggling. Struggling like Blanch in a 4th year English class.

    The depth of my wife's selfishness and craziness has come even further to light of late.

    it's times like this that call for some authoritative passive-aggressive behavior. when she's in another room give your glans a scrub down with her toothbrush like it's taking and old timey bath.

    AMwood ●

  • A.M. wood said...

    it's times like this that call for some authoritative passive-aggressive behavior. when she's in another room give your glans a scrub down with her toothbrush like it's taking and old timey bath.

    Nevermind.

    I forgot to try anal.

    Marriage is like flying with kids, if the flight had 500 connections, never ended, Ted Striker were your pilot and you ate the fish.

    Pylon St8ofmind ●

  • Dirk Hardpeck said...

    OK, gotta vent. The wife and I are looking to buy a house. On Saturday, she took me to see a house that she liked when she saw it with our agent earlier in the week (I was out of town for work). Long story short, I didn't like a single thing about the house. I explained why in a reasonable way. She accused me of not really wanting to get a house, said that we aren't on the same page, that I don't know what I want in a house, that I'm not willing to put in work on a house that we buy and that she isn't going to look at any houses, she'll leave it up to me to find something and she will tell me if she likes it.

    On Sunday sometime in the mid-afternoon, she was napping (or so I thought, she was just resting her eyes even when I came into the room several times) with our 4 month old. I had some books that I had special ordered at the bookstore to pick up. The bookstore is next to the grocery. I got the books and stopped at the grocery to pick up stuff for lunch for the week and a couple other items I knew we were low on. I get back after 40 minutes. She's upset because I didn't leave a note. OK, should have left a note, but we both have cell phones, she can reach me wherever I am. She asks where I was, I tell her. She asks if I picked up stuff for dinner, I said no. She flips, calls me selfish and says I don't ever think of anybody but myself. I tell her I'm sorry and that I'm happy to go back to the store, it's 5 minutes away. She says that's real efficient. I go to play with our daughter, she comes up a minute later and says she's leaving (she's obviously still pissed). Doesn't say where she's going and won't answer when I ask if she fed our daughter while I was gone.

    While she's gone, I go for a 30 minute walk with the baby and our dog. Go to the store for dinner stuff, feed the baby, and start dinner. She comes back 2 hours later and is giving me the cold shoulder. I'm just keeping my head down and trying to avoid her wrath. Eventually, after dinner she says she over-reacted. Doesn't really apologize.

    Yesterday, she brought up the house again, said I'm just not willing to put work into a house but she is. But she did apologize for her reaction on Sunday.

    I figure today she should hit on something about me being selfish. And around we go.

    Let us know when the divorce is final. She wants you to buy her a house for her and the kid to live in so you can pay the mtg and child support. This is the plan. Get ready.

    The dude is miserable. He's getting henpecked to death. He's losing his masculinity to a control freak who hates herself because she is now overweight post baby and realizes raising a toddler is a lot of work. This marriage won't last.

    Dude you need to get in her face and tell her who's the fucking boss or you will never be respected in your own house. Don't cower to avoid her wrath. Tell her to fuck off once in a while-- away from The kid --and that she does not control you. She will find that sexy and proceed to blow you.

    Keeping the sunshiners in check since 2000.

    Tanfan ●

  • JMSparty08 said...

    Oh, she's already made it clear that she wants to be a stay at home mom once we have kids. And it'll be my responsibility to make that happen. Oh, and when we do, we need to move back to metro Detroit nearer to our parents (Oakland county) and get a house on the lake. Don't know where this money is going to come from.

    I'm not saying she can't apply, i encouraged it, but i simply said that she needs to look at all sides and ask the right questions should she get an interview.

    Here's another divorce within the next 7 years. Dude don't have kids. All I can say. It's going to cost you. She is one of your typical American women with this sense of entitlement. She landed a lawyer so now she thinks it's stay home and go to saks with the other bitches.

    Dude why did you get married so young? Post bar exam you could be living large in nice condo, taking females on overnight dates to Chicago or the Bahamas and Judy having fun. I'm sorry for you.

    Kids don't get married untl later in life. Seriously.

    Keeping the sunshiners in check since 2000.

    Tanfan ●

  • When I think of a good marriage I actually think of Trevor and Mel. Having observed the dynamic between those two and the lovely house she has created, it's really a nice thing those two have going. Mel's dad is hilarious and I would love to have him as a father in law. Trevor is lucky. Trevor is about as easy go as it gets. Mel is just a sweetheart. Good people got together. Well done, God.

    This post was edited by Tanfan on 8/18/2012 at 9:49 AM

    Keeping the sunshiners in check since 2000.

    Tanfan ●

  • Dirk Hardpeck said...

    OK, gotta vent. The wife and I are looking to buy a house. On Saturday, she took me to see a house that she liked when she saw it with our agent earlier in the week (I was out of town for work). Long story short, I didn't like a single thing about the house. I explained why in a reasonable way. She accused me of not really wanting to get a house, said that we aren't on the same page, that I don't know what I want in a house, that I'm not willing to put in work on a house that we buy and that she isn't going to look at any houses, she'll leave it up to me to find something and she will tell me if she likes it.

    On Sunday sometime in the mid-afternoon, she was napping (or so I thought, she was just resting her eyes even when I came into the room several times) with our 4 month old. I had some books that I had special ordered at the bookstore to pick up. The bookstore is next to the grocery. I got the books and stopped at the grocery to pick up stuff for lunch for the week and a couple other items I knew we were low on. I get back after 40 minutes. She's upset because I didn't leave a note. OK, should have left a note, but we both have cell phones, she can reach me wherever I am. She asks where I was, I tell her. She asks if I picked up stuff for dinner, I said no. She flips, calls me selfish and says I don't ever think of anybody but myself. I tell her I'm sorry and that I'm happy to go back to the store, it's 5 minutes away. She says that's real efficient. I go to play with our daughter, she comes up a minute later and says she's leaving (she's obviously still pissed). Doesn't say where she's going and won't answer when I ask if she fed our daughter while I was gone.

    While she's gone, I go for a 30 minute walk with the baby and our dog. Go to the store for dinner stuff, feed the baby, and start dinner. She comes back 2 hours later and is giving me the cold shoulder. I'm just keeping my head down and trying to avoid her wrath. Eventually, after dinner she says she over-reacted. Doesn't really apologize.

    Yesterday, she brought up the house again, said I'm just not willing to put work into a house but she is. But she did apologize for her reaction on Sunday.

    I figure today she should hit on something about me being selfish. And around we go.

    do not buy that house. agree with tanfan 100%. she acts like this again you need to show her who is boss. seriously do not let her get away with that treatment.

    xGASMANx

  • Tanfan said...

    Here's another divorce within the next 7 years. Dude don't have kids. All I can say. It's going to cost you. She is one of your typical American women with this sense of entitlement. She landed a lawyer so now she thinks it's stay home and go to saks with the other bitches.

    Dude why did you get married so young? Post bar exam you could be living large in nice condo, taking females on overnight dates to Chicago or the Bahamas and Judy having fun. I'm sorry for you.

    Kids don't get married untl later in life. Seriously.

    tanner, you should really write a book about this stuff. i'd buy it. sort of like tucker max for married guys...

    little snippets of marital advice for guys. genius.

    xGASMANx

  • Tanfan said...

    Here's another divorce within the next 7 years. Dude don't have kids. All I can say. It's going to cost you. She is one of your typical American women with this sense of entitlement. She landed a lawyer so now she thinks it's stay home and go to saks with the other bitches.

    Dude why did you get married so young? Post bar exam you could be living large in nice condo, taking females on overnight dates to Chicago or the Bahamas and Judy having fun. I'm sorry for you.

    Kids don't get married untl later in life. Seriously.

    Very well put.

    signature image

    Throwback702

  • xGASMANx said...

    tanner, you should really write a book about this stuff. i'd buy it. sort of like tucker max for married guys...

    little snippets of marital advice for guys. genius.

    I am 53 years old now. I have witnessed a lot. I have shared in the grief of my buddies going through a divorce and the patterns are all the same. One thing I have learned in my many years of life: One, you need to marry the best looking woman you can land. Why? Because I have dated down and dated up. What I have learned is that almost all women are the same. They are crazy. I found myself breaking up with the 6s and 7s and staying longer with the 8's and 9s because they were easy on the eyes. I thought dating down to a 6 or 7 would be the way to go in that those women will be more caring and less neurotic. Nope! Just as bad as the 8s and 9s. So, when I pulled the plug I married the hottest woman who would have me knowing I had to be strong and powerful in the relationship everyday to keep her interested and frankly at bay. If you marry a control freak they eventually wear you down. They are never happy. NEVER. They hate themselves, so they take it out on you. You can cower and avoid, but it doesn't matter. They continue to berate and henpeck.

    My mother in law is a control freak. I figured her out and let her have it several times and told her to fuck off and stop trying to control my marriage and you know what? It worked. She never steps over the line anymore. She is in fact a joy to be around. Why? Because she knows she can't get away with it with me. Dick needs to do the same. Take charge of the bitch and let her know she can't control him; otherwise, he is going to get tired of it and file for divorce.

    Keeping the sunshiners in check since 2000.

    Tanfan ●

  • Tanfan said...

    Let us know when the divorce is final. She wants you to buy her a house for her and the kid to live in so you can pay the mtg and child support. This is the plan. Get ready.

    The dude is miserable. He's getting henpecked to death. He's losing his masculinity to a control freak who hates herself because she is now overweight post baby and realizes raising a toddler is a lot of work. This marriage won't last.

    Dude you need to get in her face and tell her who's the fucking boss or you will never be respected in your own house. Don't cower to avoid her wrath. Tell her to fuck off once in a while-- away from The kid --and that she does not control you. She will find that sexy and proceed to blow you.

    I agree with telling her to fuck off once in a while.

    You're being emasculated little by little. The first time you tell her to shut the fuck up you may have to deal with her bullshit for a while, but do not relent. Don't say sorry.

    There are things she has to do if she wants to be your wife. Treat her like it.

    All Your Base

  • It's too late for me in my marriage, because I didn't figure this shit out until it was well too late.

    I'm now just 'hanging out' and fathering my children. I don't put up with a single line of shit from her anymore. She knows this now, and has 'fallen into line' but I'll still be out once the kids are older (8 and 5). It's going to cost me something fierce - DO NOT GET MARRIED IN CALIFORNIA!!! But the day I bail will be a good day, even with alimony.

    I don't ask to do ANYTHING. I tell. I demand. You need to step and be the fucking alpha dog. To her. To her patents. In every situation. I want to come back for an MSU game, I gone. I want to go out socializIng, I gone.

    Take charge, fellas. Tanner's right in that they're all bat-shit nuts in some way or another.

    All Your Base

  • All Your Base said...

    I agree with telling her to fuck off once in a while.

    You're being emasculated little by little. The first time you tell her to shut the fuck up you may have to deal with her bullshit for a while, but do not relent. Don't say sorry.

    There are things she has to do if she wants to be your wife. Treat her like it.

    I dated a control freak who was about a 6. Her control freak nature was totally unjustified as she wasn't good looking enough to demand such control. I eventually figured out her controlling ways and dumped her by email. roflmao I look her up every once in a while and she is still not married!!!!! its' been zilly years since I gave her the final fuck off and no one can tolerate her. She will never marry.

    Keeping the sunshiners in check since 2000.

    Tanfan ●

  • Tanfan said...

    I dated a control freak who was about a 6. Her control freak nature was totally unjustified as she wasn't good looking enough to demand such control. I eventually figured out her controlling ways and dumped her by email. roflmao I look her up every once in a while and she is still not married!!!!! its' been zilly years since I gave her the final fuck off and no one can tolerate her. She will never marry.

    The horrible mistake that is my wife won't ever be able to remarry once I gone.

    She caught the 'I'm married and don't have to take care of myself' disease.

    I even fell into that for a while. Decided that was a bad idea, lost 60 pounds, and now get eye-sexed every day.

    Don't make that mistake, guys. If you don't have kids and you're getting this kind of crap, lay down the law right the-fuck now.

    This post was edited by All Your Base on 8/18/2012 at 10:49 AM

    All Your Base

  • One final thought: sex is a right, and is to be demanded WHENEVER you want it.

    If she's ever given you head - when dating, when married - but DOESNT anymore - that's on YOU.

    Spell things out clearly. Tell her what you expect if she wants to remain your wife. Use that term - if she wants to remain your wife.

    You'll be surprised how well it works.

    This post was edited by All Your Base on 8/18/2012 at 11:04 AM

    All Your Base

  • All Your Base said...

    One final thought: sex is a right, and is to be demanded WHENEVER you want it.

    If she's ever given you head - when dating, when married - but DOESNT anymore - that's on YOU.

    Spell things out clearly. Tell her what you expect if she wants to remain your wife. Use that term - if she wants to remain your wife.

    You'll be surprised how well it works.

    That's a man talking.

    Keeping the sunshiners in check since 2000.

    Tanfan ●

  • Tanfan said...

    That's a man talking.

    Sadly, it's going to cost me a hell of a lot. But it's better to pay to learn the lesson than to never have learned it at all.

    You young bucks would be wise to learn it before it costs you half your shit.

    This post was edited by All Your Base on 8/18/2012 at 12:23 PM

    All Your Base

  • Why the censor? It hasn't been ***** in a long time. Stupid.

    signature image signature image signature image

    Formerly Venomous Green Duck. Join Date: Nov. 2004 # of posts: 17,867.

    VenomousGDuck23

  • VenomousG.Duck said...

    Why the censor? It hasn't been ***** in a long time. Stupid.

    My personal favorite is when Mel had the title changed to "Bump When Your Wife Is Acting Like A Wolverine"

    You can edit it back - it's actually quite fun to play that game. I'd suggest doing it when Barnes isn't around - probably tonight after 9pm

    This post was edited by Dr Strangelove on 8/18/2012 at 1:37 PM

    Ever get the feeling you've been cheated?

    Dr Strangelove ●

  • VenomousG.Duck said...

    Why the censor? It hasn't been ***** in a long time. Stupid.

    you can see who changed it

    signature image signature image signature image

    Snake Plissken ●

  • Tanfan said...

    Take charge of the bitch and let her know she can't control him.

    Play

    Seduce&Destroy (Part I)

    Franck T.J Macky talks about how can you pick up a girl. Respect the cock and tame the cunt. No pussy has 9 lives.

    http://www.youtube.com/v/_n2IVF9a2IA

    Ted Brogan

  • Slightly relevant bump.

    Today I walked past a married couple, probably in their mid 30s, and caught a bit of their conversation. Unless the wife was racist, she was talking about laundry and said, "Next time we can try separating the whites from the colors." The guy smiled and agreed with her, but I sensed deeper pain.

    I nodded at the guy as a bit of moral support. During that brief eye contact it's like he was dead behind his eyes. The look on his face said, "I hate this."

    When you spend so much time with one person, and the most interesting thing you have to discuss is laundry, that can't be too enjoyable.

    Ted Brogan

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