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My brother came up the weekend after st paddy's day to party at Eden Roc apts. We got a keg of green beer since it was cheaper, some hot and readies, and then played a lot of beer pong. He went out to the balcony where someone offered him what he thought was a black and mild but turned out to be a blunt. He got real sick and puked green beer and pizza all over the hood of an SUV that was parked below.
"Pinch her ass, Sparky!"
I think this qualifies.
Living in Akers, go to a house party off campus. Women from the Sister floor go with us, one of them is from Holt.
The gal from Holt has a friend on campus from HS for the weekend.
At the party a friend of ours hooks up with the woman from Holt's friend and goes upstairs and has sex with her. In the middle of the act, the gal from our Sister floor goes looking for her, and walks in on them doing the deed. Her friend claims she was raped out of embarrassment.
Cops called, they barge in and arrest my friend. No questions asked. Cuffed and off to jail. No witnesses interviewed. Nothing.
They take the gal to the ER for the rape kit to gather evidence, in the middle of it she comes to her senses and claims she was not raped, tells the cops it was consentual. Charges get dropped.
My buddy has since been transferred from the EL Jail to the Ingham County lockup. He has now been in jail for about 8 hours. We go pick him up when released, and take him to breakfast.
Who is sitting in the same restaurant when we walk in? His accuser.
I give him credit, he left her alone while in the restaurant considering how bad she could have screwed up his life to save face. I was yelling comments at her while we were there because I knew how close her actions came to making his life a living Hell.
I've got a list that would rival most here. I'll start with a short one.
A friend of mine who wasn't a natural with the ladies was making serious headway early on during a house party of ours.
He and the lady sat down near our beer pong table to chat. Little did he know that a friend of my sisters was attending that we all knew to be horrible at holding his booze.
Amidst my buddy's flirtation, I noticed that Mr. Lightweight was milling around the beer pong table trying to use it as a prop to keep himself stable. Then, my sister noticed him fiddling with his pants and told me I better get him outside.
Mr. Lightweight pulls a 180 and starts hosing down my buddy and this girl. They don't notice until they're already getting wet. I ran Mr. Lightweight outside, using his piss stream to move people out of the way. I tossed him outside, as my buddy's new friend runs out and off into the street, with beer piss all over her.
Can't win 'em all.
This post was edited by Spartan NutsNE1 11 months ago
Girls that do this deserve to be publicly shamed and then put on a list like actual sex offenders. In no way am I saying their actions are comparable, but they are terrible people and the dating public deserves to be aware of them.
Your grandchildren's grandchildren will someday hear of that laugh. A laugh not forgotten.
A couple ones...
I puked on the bar at the Bellagio once, the bartenders didn't see me so I played it off and walked away, leaving a huge puddle of puke marinating on the bar at one of the more "high-end" clubs in Vegas.
Following the puke theme, some friends an I were in a crowded german bar in MPLS. My buddy is super wasted, gets up and runs for the bathroom. He comes back a few mints later, and tells us that there was a huge line he crashed through (the classic "out of the way, I'm gonna puke!" scene). He didn't quite make it to the front of the line or the stall, and puked all over the back of a guy using the urinal. We laughed and asked "holy shit, did you get in a fight? Did he try to kick your ass?". He says "No, he was cool about it"...and points to a guy across the bar calmly hanging out and drinking with is friends, his back/ass/legs soaking wet with my friend's puke. We kept an eye on him, he stayed there and hung out covered in puke for the rest of the night.
In spring break in Florida, my rather large friend is doing a 4 story beer bong hung out the balcony upstairs down to the beach. The bong fit something ridiculous like 12 beers. There's a huge crowd gathered on the beach around the beer bong volunteers. My buddy bongs the whole thing, sending the crowd into a frenzy. Immediatley following the successful bong, some random kid grabs by buddy and screams in his face "YEAHHHH...THAT WAS FUCKING AWESOME!!!!!". My buddy turns toward him and unleashes a river of puke directly into this guys face from about 4 inches away...I've never seen more puke in my life, it was like 5 gallons...it completely engulfed this kid's whole face/head/torso/etc. The crowd goes "YEAAAHHHHH......OHHHHHHHHHHH" and then my buddy turns around, hands up like Rocky while the shocked and soaked random slinks away as we all laugh our asses off.
Early on at MSU I was an violent drunk for no reason. Walking with some friends from one party to another I ended up punching a mailbox, caving it in. I ended up tearing skin off of my knuckle and bleeding pretty profusely. We went to the Subway that is across from QD on Grand River so I could wash my arm off and make myself a paper towel bandage. I walk inside and there is a long line for the bathroom, the dude in the front looks at my holding my arm to prevent blood from dripping on the floor and says, "you should probably go first man." I thank the dude and I go in to wash out my knuckle and I bleed all over the place. It looked like a someone butchered a cow in there when I left.
We continued on to Cedar Village and I met a hot chick who bandaged up my knuckle. I thanked her by squeezing one of her tits when I hugged her. Girl probably saved my knuckle from getting infected and I palm her tit.
I hope she let him have a no holes barred, free run at her so he could hate fuck the shit out her to make up for that bs.
My sophomore year in college when my best friends lived in cedar village we made up a game called "kick the box" where you put a huge rock inside of an empty 30-pack case and place it on the sidewalk. As people would stroll by we would chant "kick the box, kick the box". Naturally people would feel encouraged and kick it as hard as they could, hit the rock, and limp away. This got so big that people on both sides of cedar street would join in on the chanting.
This provided hours of entertainment until one tough guy didn't find kicking a rock too funny and stormed our ground level balcony looking to fight. Long story short, a friend of a friend ended up getting his ass kicked in the McDonald's parking lot.
Unless you went to MSU in like 1930 you probably didn't invent that.
Along those same lines, after the bar or house parties we used to play "drunk catch" with a football on Bailey St. We'd just go out for a long pass (35 yards) in front of a group of people and feign making a catch while the ball blasted someone in the crowd. "Sorry. My bad. That guy can't throw for shit."
As I just wrote this out, I realize we were dicks and losers all rolled into one big shit bag.
This post was edited by Roger Waymeth 11 months ago
It's a simple concept, I'm sure we weren't the first.
I only needed that much of the story to literally LOL
Another one of my more memorable "party foul" stories:
I was at a frat party with some people from my dorm and it just really wasn't my scene. I was with a big group, so a few of us strolled upstairs to just hangout, drink and get away from the crowd. Anyway, we're standing by this common room that has all the entrances blocked off with chairs and all the lights out. We weren't planning on entering it until we hear what sounds like someone taking a piss on the floor. We start peeking our heads in the room and no sooner than we do, does some meathead come and start yelling at us. We explain it sounds like someone took a piss in the room and he instantly accuses us of doing it. After some arguing a few more frat bros show up and one of them enters the room. He flips on the light and in unison everyone drops an F-bomb. The drop ceiling was water logged (there was an unkown bathroom leak upstairs) and curving down a good foot from where it should be. A small trickle of water was dripping from the tile in the center. Panicking, the guy in the room attempts to push the tile up and his hands go right through it releasing a storm of shit water all over himself and the room. At this point we are amazed/laughing/gagging from the smell and get kicked out of the party. Later in the night we walked by the house and the Fire Dept. was there trying to fix/clean the mess.
Hahaha I remember that. I think that dude broke his foot.
"Tonight, we show the world what this program is made of!" -- Brian Ellerbe on Mar 4, 2000, the night of scUM's 51-point loss to MSU.
The worst one I have probably ever committed was at Rick's. It was at the tail end of a study abroad reunion bar crawl, one of those nights where there's just round after round of shots going down. The place is packed and we're posted up at the end of the bar by the door, on the side with the stage, and somebody orders a round of SoCo Limes. I caught a whiff of it when they were getting passed around and knew there was about a 90% chance it was going to put me over the edge into puke town, but I wasn't about to refuse a shot and have a bunch of people call me a pussy. So we all rip the shot, and immediately I know, yep, this is about to come right back up, I turn and start power striding to the bathrooms in the back and make it about halfway there before I have to stop to unleash two full heaves into my pitcher of busch light, which thankfully was pretty low because the vom filled that thing right up to the brim. I'm frozen there for a second looking down at it and getting my breath, convinced I'm going to look up and see like 50 people staring back at me appalled, but when I do, nobody has noticed, not one person even giving me a passing glance. So I just dropped off my pitcher full of puke on the bar, walked around to the other side and bought a new one, and then rejoined the bar crawl group like nothing ever happened.
This post was edited by Just1Spartan 11 months ago
atta boy. that's how its done. 99% of the time it's all about how you act/react. No freakn' and ere'thang is usally cool.
Girls that do that deserve to be hanged.
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