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Oh I agree with you early on. After a point though, the baby's gotta do some hard time in the crib. Parents need alone time too
The co-sleepers make it much easier to transition to the crib
no clue honestly. I have had enough trouble taking care of my cat.
But congrats on having a son! Definitely get him into sports asap.
Here you go :)
Sleep when the baby sleeps
And may your first child be a masculine child.
Luca brasi (sp?)
Held it down for Monty
Held it down For Iz
Seriously though what minnie said is huge. you can lecture all you want but your kid will do what you do not what you say.
1) Don't buy so many newborn and #1 diapers, little man will be out of those things quick. (this advise maybe too late)
2) It's easy for Dad the first 3-4 months, you aren't the food source so enjoy it while you can cause it will get harder.
3) Avoid late night fights when you both are tired and not thinking straight.
4) Don't fall asleep with them on the couch EVER.
5) The most important: Be prepared to come to terms with everything you do not like about yourself becuse the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Flip side all the cool stuff about you is even funnier in pint size. My son told my wife "Ok just stop talking already" the other day. It was great, my wife was like "oh my god just like daddy"...
Listen to your wife's instincts and yours. Do what works for YOUR baby. I know some people said to get the baby on a schedule right away. That's fine if you have a baby that works like that. We didn't. You may end up with a super compliant baby. If you do, that is super for you. You may end up with a fussy baby who is high maintenance. Here's the links if you ever need to come back to them. If you have a fussy baby, there is nothing you can do to make him like other babies. He'll just be wired differently. I tell this to all expectant parents I meet because we didn't understand we had a fussy baby until months and months into it. We thought the problem was we were new parents, the winter weather doldrums, etc.
Take lots of video, even of the most mundane things. Yes to the pictures too. But the videos are so great and there is so much you will forget if you don't get it with the video camera. Pictures won't stir the memories like a video.
I agree with knowing when to walk away. Put the baby down and walk away. It happens to almost every parent.
Sleep deprivation is a torture tool. You will soon understand why. You and your wife may feel like your life is over. It does get better. Really. But don't kid yourself. Unless you get a dream baby, the first few months are tough.
Do not try to live up to others' expectations. If breastfeeding doesn't work, it doesn't matter. If your baby doesn't sleep through the night right away, it doesn't matter. If your baby likes a binky, thank God they exist. Just enjoy making your own decisions and don't worry about what anyone else tells you. I've seen parent melt down over the most ridiculous things like making the decision to use a binky. It was like the future of Western Civilization was over because they put the thing in their child's mouth. Do whatever makes all three of you happy and ignore everyone else.
People will tell your wife that babies love being worn all the time. No, not all of them do.
In Michigan in the winter, wipe warmers are really nice. People will say you don't need them, but I think they are a kindness you show your child.
If you or your wife are the worrying type, get a baby monitor with a motion sensor. They are unbelievably sensitive and will give you more peace of mind.
I don't know if your wife is having a c-section, but if she is then there is another list of advice I would give you (as a woman).
That's it off the top of my head.
Congratulations! Babies are a miracle.
Health, nutrition, recipes, attachment parenting, breastfeeding help and advice from Dr William Sears
Having done this twice, the first year isn't that bad. It's year 2.5 to 3.5 that's tough. They are teething and can't talk yet. It's not until they hit 6 does it get easier. From 9 on its s breeze.
Keeping the sunshiners in check since 2000.
1. The first few weeks are easier than you think they'll be. Kid will sleep most of the time. You'll be a nervous wreck at first, but you'll be surprised how easily you'll grow into the role of a parent.
2. Except for onesies and blankets, you won't need any of the crap you bought for at least a month. Don't sweat having everything ready and put together. You'll have plenty of time.
*3* At some point, you will learn why people put their kids in the microwave. (Don't do it). There will be plenty of times when the baby is crying, you can't make it stop and you are at the very end of your rope. As Beaumont said, take a break. And back each other up on this. If Mel is about to lose it, don't ask questions, take over. If you're at work and she calls you and you hear the baby crying, get your ass home. (and she should do the same for you).
Don't think -- it can only hurt the ballclub
Congrats Trev and Mel!
I have absolutely no words of wisdom or advice. All 4 of my kids are now gone, they've all finished college and are in their careers, they're all married, and some already have kids of their own. I have no idea what happened in between them being born and where they are now. It goes fast and I have a very short memory. They all have minds of their own and even have the gull to disagree with their old man, as it should be, I guess.
Actually, I'm glad they're all gone. As soon as they were born, I just wanted them to grow up and let them live their lives as they saw fit. So I guess I did get that part right.
I take it you won't be at the tailgate Sat?
This post has been edited 2 times, most recently by Frank Ricard 17 months ago
When he's eight years old and accidentally sets fire to the living room rug... go easy on him.
Just my humble opinion.
Unless Mel is Cambodian, just the baby.
I am going to take a wild guess that you don't have kids.
Be tough but fair, tell him the truth, don't lie to him, even if it is a odd question. Babies don't care if you are hungover and it really sucks changing a diaper full of poop when hungover. Be prepared to get peed, pooped, and thrown up on. Be prepared to pull all nighters and go to work, save your sick and vacation days, because they will all be used when then kid is sick (unless Mel is going to be a stay at home mom) and if she is, for your sake when you get home, take the baby and let her go for a walk, workout, whatever or she will go crazy. Don't be overly paranoid and when they get hurt don't freak out calmly asses the situation and take the action necessary. When they start crawling walking and fall, laugh, they look at your reaction and base theirs on yours if they really are not hurt.
Most of all Savor it, my kids are only 3.5 and 1.5, and I already miss the chest naps, and holding them while they drink a bottle. Take A LOT of pictures, post them on Facebook, your family will like seeing them, some friends without kids will find it annoying, but you aren't going to be seeing them much anymore anyway. Once your boy gets older he will be your buddy, but for awhile he is going to be a mama's boy, don't take it personally. Be goofy with him, it is fun and relieves a lot of stress. And go with your gut. Have fun, it will be stressful but you will get through it all. If you are getting frustrated because he won't go to sleep, go on your porch while he is in the crib and get some fresh air and calm down, they can sense tention. If Mel is the primary caregiver, provider of food for awhile and she is out, have her leave a shirt that she has worn somewhere, he will recognize her smell and calm him down. Trust me it sounds weird but it works.
The stuff about getting on a schedule pretty quickly is spot on.
I would also warn you that your entire mindset about life is going to change over the course of the next 6 months - 1 year. You will start thinking about and caring about things that you never even thought twice about before. It probably would have been nice to realize that before it happened.
Knibb High football rules
In the hospital, 24 hours after the first one was born, I was "trying to help" by changing a diaper. Did NOT know about what happens when cold air hits warm tiny winkie.. Was reaching for the new diaper, looked back, and a thin, glistening light-yellow stream was arcing over my shoulder and onto my back. Wife thought it was hysterical. ALWAYS have a second one ready when you open the front of the current one. ALWAYS!
My Blood Runs Green.....
There is a lot of wisdom in here. Most of it amounts to, do what YOU think is best, and what Makes Sense, not what other people tell you. That Aesop Fable about the Man, the Boy and the Donkey applies here. You cannot make everyone happy, you WILL be criticized. Do what makes sense.
You will probably try to do everything perfectly. Every Parent of more than one child on this board will agree with this next section.
On the first kid, when the binky falls on the floor, you get one of several spares, and boil and dry the one that fell before using it again. On the second kid, you rinse it off and pop it back in. On the third one, 5 second rule applies. Sometimes you rinse, sometimes you just blow it off and pop it back in. ANYONE I've ever said this to, who had 2 or more kids, laughed and agreed, immediately. (BTW, sheilding your child from EVERY possible germ will eventually reduce the strength of their own immune system. NOT AT FIRST, Not in the first month, but eventually, some exposure to the world can help them, long term. )
Notice how nearly every firstborn newborn seems to survive their first year? You'll learn what you need to know, as you come to it. You WILL get things wrong. Like the poster above said, the fate of Western Civilization does not ride on most of the decisions you will make, or the things you do. Do the best you can, and call it good. If my two survived ME, and grew up to be college graduates, you'll very likely do just fine.
You will also stop thinking about things that are "very important to you" right now, because their relative importance WRT the child is miniscule...
+1 These are excellent.
#5 is really true, my son is my clone, has my bad traits and good traits. I hate that he has my bad traits. But the good traits are fun.
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