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My WTF?!? moment of the day.

  • DDRMSU said...

    After several glasses of wine last night, this seemed like a somewhat funny story to post. In retrospect, I probably should have waited until the head was a bit more clear. Now I'm shaking my head and asking myself, "did I really have to come home from work and clean up the house keepers' crap?". Something wrong with this picture. Though I am still baffled by the sheer physics and trajectory that had to be followed for this to happen...

    Just think where else has she pooped? Like they say if you see one turd there's probably 300 more that you can't see.

    ColonelAngus

  • DDRMSU said...

    No. I run a reasonably large company, so I have better things to do than sweep my floors when I am home. And I can afford it. Ergo, I have house keepers. Gardeners, too. Problems with that? (or were you just indirectly inquiring if I had an opening to clean my house?)

    Edit.... Geez. Note to self - don't respond to trolls when drinking....

    You just can't find good help anymore.

    152 Gunson

  • Pics of housekeepers pooping?

    What is that, a Titleist? A hole in one...

    Cosmo_Kramer

  • DDRMSU said...

    No way. It's creepy to think of the RCMB faithful, in their mom's basements, doing whatever they do to my daughters picture. I did take a pic of the turd if you'd like to see that.

    Not having a picture isn't going to stop them from imagining it shrug

    You might as well just post the picture.

    Gomer

  • So...........

    USA TODAY

    http://m.usatoday.com/article/news/1721035

    m.usatoday.com

    Haters gonna hate!

    TempleSpartan ●

  • y2kMgrad said...

    are you that dirty and lazy that you need housekeepers?

    My wife used to clean up for when ours would come. Not joking. Now that we have teens we make them do all the hateful stuff.

    signature image signature image signature image

    DWags

  • y2kMgrad said...

    lol

    lol
    Classic trolling

    Stils ●

  • DDRMSU said...

    After several glasses of wine last night, this seemed like a somewhat funny story to post. In retrospect, I probably should have waited until the head was a bit more clear. Now I'm shaking my head and asking myself, "did I really have to come home from work and clean up the house keepers' crap?". Something wrong with this picture. Though I am still baffled by the sheer physics and trajectory that had to be followed for this to happen...

    A) I'm guessing the housekeeper placed the turd on the wall. No idea why, maybe because she was expecting a Thanksgiving day present.

    B) I have a housekeeper and gardener as well. F all these haters.

    C) Brentwood Spartan

    One Night! One team! Kill blue! Bleed Green!

    Stubarino

  • DDRMSU said...

    No. I run a reasonably large company, so I have better things to do than sweep my floors when I am home. And I can afford it. Ergo, I have house keepers. Gardeners, too. Problems with that? (or were you just indirectly inquiring if I had an opening to clean my house?)

    Regarding the housekeeper position... I might be interested. Could you describe your daughter's carpet to us?

    Gomer

  • Sounds like someone had Chipotle.

    Formerly Blade Runner.

    tManWithNoName ●

  • DDRMSU said...

    No way. It's creepy to think of the RCMB faithful, in their mom's basements, doing whatever they do to my daughters picture. I did take a pic of the turd if you'd like to see that.

    Why is there so much hate for basements on this board? shrug

    signature image signature image signature image

    Jack N Coke

  • ~Stils~ said...

    lol
    Classic trolling

    I know. Hook, line and sinker.

    Spartans ...committed to bring Paul Bunyan home in 2013.

    DDRMSU

  • open choke

    Green Note

  • Don't Post Poop!

    Don't post poop!

    SeeRockCity

  • Fingercuffs said...

    In case you haven't noticed, it's become a bad thing to work hard and be successful in America. Incredible, isn't it?

    Wells

    Dallasparty: "With this attitude, the purest of crap is YOU.Dude, you need to start caring. And that goes for everyone else on here."

    TVs Frank21789

  • Where are the housekeepers from?

    You might have a toilet squatter on your hands. People used to squatting over a hole in the floor often stand on the toilet and squat rather than sitting.

    One slip is all it takes. Happened at our office once. Came in and the toilet seat was broken and there was crap on the wall.

    attachment

    Lester Diamond

  • DDRMSU said...

    Way OT, but....
    My daughter came home tonight for the holiday weekend. She comes in, kisses my wife and I hello and quickly dashes for the bathroom (2 hour commute and a large diet Pepsi pressure apparently). A moment later she emerges and says, "uh, Dad? Did you know there is a turd on the wall?"

    Me: "A what? Where?"
    Her: "I think it's poop. On the wall"

    Now mind you, last I knew, neither my wife nor i do or can crap sideways. And the housekeepers had been there while we worked today, and were just leaving as I arrived home from work So I go into the bathroom and look. Uh, yeah. There was a small, but unmistakably reasonably fresh turd on the wall by the toilet just above the baseboard. How in the world can this happen? Do women hover above the toilet and perhaps shart scatter gun like? Had to be one of the house keepers, I'm guessing. But aside from the fact that my wife and daughter are either freaking out (wife) or shrieking with laughter (daughter), I'm now disinfecting the freaking wall while trying to figure out the mere physics of such an outcome.

    My only plausible reaction was, WTF?!?

    I know, cool story. Or not. But how in the hell can someone hit a freaking wall while taking the browns to the super bowl?

    Funniest. Post. Ever. lol +1

    LoneWolfSparty ●

  • Lester Diamond said...

    Where are the housekeepers from?

    You might have a toilet squatter on your hands. People used to squatting over a hole in the floor often stand on the toilet and squat rather than sitting.

    One slip is all it takes. Happened at our office once. Came in and the toilet seat was broken and there was crap on the wall.

    Mexico, but have been in the US for at least twenty years. They started their cleaning service on our recommendation sixteen years ago, and are doing well with it.

    Maybe your answer is the key. But good lord. What does it take to crap IN the toilet? I mean seriously...one has to line up two holes, and one of them is like a foot and a half wide.

    Spartans ...committed to bring Paul Bunyan home in 2013.

    DDRMSU

  • Best guess? Your housekeeper delayed too long in going to the bathroom. Runs in, undoes pants, starts to sit down, then poomb! splat! The fatso thinks, "Crap! What was that?" ("Mierda! ¿Qué fue eso?") Looks in the toilet. Here? No. Looks at the base of the toilet: front, sides, behind. Here? Here? Here? No. Checks in the folds of mammoth panties nestled at her ankles. Here? No. Definitely not. Wonders if it's possible that it was a well-endowed fart. Remembers the urgency of the whoosh as it escaped, its unmistakeably 3-dimensional nature. And yet- she lets her eyes make the rounds again. Toilet? Floor at the base of the toilet? Folds of her mammoth panties? All clear. She thinks to herself, "Farts are the damndest things!" ("Pedos son las cosas de damndest!"). Shrugs her shoulders. Sits down and finishes.

    Think of the masturbation gel in the hair routine from Something About Mary. Shit happens.

    This post has been edited 5 times, most recently by GreenMeany on 11/23/2012 at 12:50 AM

    "Look at this. An entire generation of Cinderellas, and there's no glass slipper coming." -- Mother in ALMOST FAMOUS

    GreenMeany

  • GreenMeany said...

    Best guess? Your housekeeper delayed too long in going to the bathroom. Runs in, undoes pants, starts to sit down, then poomb! splat! The fatso thinks, "Crap! What was that?" ("Mierda! ¿Qué fue eso?") Looks in the toilet. Here? No. Looks at the base of the toilet: front, sides, behind. Here? Here? Here? No. Checks in the folds of mammoth panties nestled at her ankles. Here? No. Definitely not. Wonders if it's possible that it was a well-endowed fart. Remembers the urgency of the whoosh as it escaped, its unmistakeably 3-dimensional nature. And yet- she lets her eyes make the rounds again. Toilet? Floor at the base of the toilet? Folds of her mammoth panties? All clear. She thinks to herself, "Farts are the damndest things!" ("Pedos son las cosas de damndest!"). Shrugs her shoulders. Sits down and finishes.

    Think of the masturbation gel in the hair routine from Something About Mary. Shit happens.

    blank

    Sp4rt4ns

  • You might want to check the upper deck too.

    OldOneEye

  • She may have sharted:

    Play

    hall pass bathroom scene

    When wacky girl take a fart!! the best fart scene ever!! movie worth seeing it!!

    http://www.youtube.com/v/2ojE9D5zjPA

    35,600 posts and counting since 09-09-2002. tRCMB Dead Pool Commissioner.

    pulling69 ●

  • No. No meester DDR. I no clean the poop.

    signature image

    You're in college. The window of opportunity to drink and do drugs and take advantage of young girls is getting smaller by the day.

    OPatMSU

  • No. No meester DDR. I no clean the poop.

    signature image

    You're in college. The window of opportunity to drink and do drugs and take advantage of young girls is getting smaller by the day.

    OPatMSU

  • I posted this story in the random thoughts thread but I think a good poo story should be shared here.

    Z.Cavaricci1787 posts
    I wasn’t going to start a new thread for this but this was a great poo stories if you are into poo stories. So my wife and I went to Vail for a few days and stayed at her business partners condo. They were there with their 2 kids and we brought our 10 month old daughter. The adults went out for dinner one night and we hired a babysitter to watch all the kids. She was hired from 6 to 10pm. We went out for dinner and drinks and decided to head back to the condo just after 9.
    As we are walking up to the door we notice it is open a crack and we were worried because their kids earlier in the day kept walking out the front door. We open the door and the babysitter comes running up and quickly comes outside before we can go in. We noticed a guy behind her when she does this. Her eye makeup was all over her face and she looked all disheveled, possibly crying. We were all kind of worried at this point that she was either banging some dude or something happened to the kids. The guy that was behind her looked like he was in a uniform of some kind and then she tells us what happened.
    The first thing out of her mouth was “I am so sorry but please don’t go in there.” We are of course concerned but she then follows up with “I am on a detox diet and I used the bathroom in the master bath. It is clogged and will not flush. I tried flushing it but the toilet overflowed and water went all over the floor.” So it turns out the man in the uniform was a maintenance man cleaning up her shit. She panicked and called them and was so embarrassed that she was crying. She thought she had another 45minutes to cleanup in time before we got home.

    This post was edited by ZCavaricci21757 on 11/23/2012 at 8:57 AM

    ZCavaricci21757 ●

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