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Suggestions on how we can mess w/ my father in law?

  • Did you pre-pay for the surgery or something and now want your money's worth?

    MiamiSpartan

  • Born2Kill said...

    This one will take some effort, but its worth it.

    Go to a nearby farm and capture a large pig. It's going to be gross but you're going to have to lather some blood on the pig and sneak it into the hospital room where your F.I.L. is. Next, use makeup to put fake surgery scars on both your father in law and the pig.

    Convince your father in law that they had to give him an emergency heart transplant, and pig hearts is common practice. No one wanted to see the pig die, so they gave the pig his old heart, the pig doesn't have long to live.

    Here is the "prank" part, make your FIL think he and the pig have switched traits. When he speaks, act like you have no idea what he is saying, and laugh at him. However, when the pig makes noises, make similar "oinking" noises back to the pig.

    After a while, your frustrated father in law will think he is the one oinking. To carry this running joke on for a few years will be tough but doable.

    You will have to make sure your father in law doesn't speak in English to any other human for the next couple years, and also, at family functions, try and have a pig around for you guys to "talk" to. End the gag in a couple years on a holiday or something.

    You put a lot of work into nothing.

    Vegas Vic

  • at least he'll be healthy and can continue to by Coach bags for his daughter....

    CmdrNebula19863

  • Born2Kill said...

    This one will take some effort, but its worth it.

    Go to a nearby farm and capture a large pig. It's going to be gross but you're going to have to lather some blood on the pig and sneak it into the hospital room where your F.I.L. is. Next, use makeup to put fake surgery scars on both your father in law and the pig.

    Convince your father in law that they had to give him an emergency heart transplant, and pig hearts is common practice. No one wanted to see the pig die, so they gave the pig his old heart, the pig doesn't have long to live.

    Here is the "prank" part, make your FIL think he and the pig have switched traits. When he speaks, act like you have no idea what he is saying, and laugh at him. However, when the pig makes noises, make similar "oinking" noises back to the pig.

    After a while, your frustrated father in law will think he is the one oinking. To carry this running joke on for a few years will be tough but doable.

    You will have to make sure your father in law doesn't speak in English to any other human for the next couple years, and also, at family functions, try and have a pig around for you guys to "talk" to. End the gag in a couple years on a holiday or something.

    You had me at "capture a large pig"

    Spartan2011

  • Alright, this could be fantastic.

    signature image

    TheBlitzIsOn

  • keep pointing a flashlight on his eyes until he wakes up and keep repeating in a haunting voice - "Come toward the light"

    CmdrNebula19863

  • Cmdr.Nebula said...

    keep pointing a flashlight on his eyes until he wakes up and keep repeating in a haunting voice - "Come toward the light"

    While wearing a Jesus/Dinosaur costume.

    signature image

    Born2Kill

  • Make him read a gHost thread

    Playsignature image

    mpcoan

  • Vegas Vic said...

    You put a lot of work into nothing.

    Your life must be absolutely miserable.

    signature image signature image signature image

    Now knowing what 1995 is like all over again! Thank you 247 technology!!

    InTenSity

  • Put a sheet over his head and move his bed into the morgue.

    signature image

    msu90

  • Tell him insurance won't cover unnecessary surgery.

    NigelUno

  • Dr Leo Spaceman said...

    And the other half are....???

    His side of the family.

    LogicalBuck

  • I'm sorry, it's been a while since I visited this thread. What was wrong with him? was he the one up in the tree?

    I amend my advice -- call the fire department to get him down.

    SpartanInNH

  • Put a bra on him and stuff it. Tell him you had the doctor add a couple implants for the men of the family.

    signature image

    Plate of Shrimp

  • You'd be mistaken, my fellow Spartan. I'm a few years younger than Vegas Vic, but I know for a fact that he was one of the most popular guys in his class all through his school days. He was a guy with integrity and one of those students who could be counted on for whatever project needed to be done right. He is a fantastic father and husband. Think what you want about Vegas Vic, but he's a Spartan that we can all be proud of. Miserable life? Not Vegas Vic. I just don't want you to have the wrong image of him. He's happily retired the same as I am. Sparty On young Spartan. Enjoy what you've made of yourself at MSU. Some of the best times in life and friendships can be found there. Both Vegas Vic and I married Spartan women.

    Kruhulik

  • Get him a JumpStart battery and a shoulder strap. Replace the jumper cables with nipple clamps.

    EdMartinsLoan

  • Tell him you saw a half man, half pig. Pigman

    This post was edited by Spartan8Ball on 4/6/2012 at 8:33 PM

    signature image

    Spartan8Ball

  • This is the guy that was wearing the I heart Boobs shirt at a tailgate a few seasons ago, right? Get him some bewbs.

    35,600 posts and counting since 09-09-2002. tRCMB Dead Pool Commissioner.

    pulling69

  • Handcuff him to his bed. When he awakes, tell him he had a bad reaction to his meds and security had no choice. loco

    Captn

  • Born2Kill said...

    This one will take some effort, but its worth it.

    Go to a nearby farm and capture a large pig. It's going to be gross but you're going to have to lather some blood on the pig and sneak it into the hospital room where your F.I.L. is. Next, use makeup to put fake surgery scars on both your father in law and the pig.

    Convince your father in law that they had to give him an emergency heart transplant, and pig hearts is common practice. No one wanted to see the pig die, so they gave the pig his old heart, the pig doesn't have long to live.

    Here is the "prank" part, make your FIL think he and the pig have switched traits. When he speaks, act like you have no idea what he is saying, and laugh at him. However, when the pig makes noises, make similar "oinking" noises back to the pig.

    After a while, your frustrated father in law will think he is the one oinking. To carry this running joke on for a few years will be tough but doable.

    You will have to make sure your father in law doesn't speak in English to any other human for the next couple years, and also, at family functions, try and have a pig around for you guys to "talk" to. End the gag in a couple years on a holiday or something.

    +1

    What the hell is wrong with you?

    signature image

    "You learned the two greatest thing in life, never rat on your friends, and always keep your mouth shut." ~Robert DeNiro

    Jimmy Conway

  • Real quick, check to se if he is circumsized. If not, then chop the top off of that carrot. When he finds out he will either be super pissed or super happy that you did what he was afraid to do. Either way you win.

    signature image

    "You learned the two greatest thing in life, never rat on your friends, and always keep your mouth shut." ~Robert DeNiro

    Jimmy Conway

  • Hire male doctor strippers

    signature image

    A man's gotta eat!

    Stan Sitwell

  • Put him in a suit like Slim Goodbody, tell him the doctor read the directions backwards.

    signature image

    Plate of Shrimp

  • You all should put on sweaters and winter coats. When he wakes up, act all happy that he came out of the coma finally. Then tell him he missed MSU winning the BCS Championship Game last week against USC.

    signature image signature image signature image

    "I'm just a humble mutha fucker with a big ass dick" -Bunk Moreland

    SpartanNachos

  • Use some of your 247 dollars to buy off the hospital staff to clear the floor. Put some chains on the exit doors and paint "Don't open, dead inside" on them.

    Osmo

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