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Unique / unconventional call in sick excuse - post here

  • Just say you were listening to "I wanna get drunk" by lil Jon and decided to go get drunk all day?

    signature image

    "As far as the downvotes. It's a gnat biting an lion" -- A member of tRCMB Justice League, taking the internet WAY WAY too seriously.

    Rocket_Play ●

  • The Only Colors said...

    About 15 years ago, an employee called me to let me know they won't be able to make in that day. I asked why & their response was, and I kid you not,

    "Well I got lost by 6 Flags & I decided to go in" .....

    Our office building is a solid hour away from 6 Flags & he had been with us for several months.

    Well if I were him I'd ask me why you were questioning me about calling in.

    Drives me nuts. I'm allotted three sick days a year. I shouldn't have to tell you whats wrong with me.

    signature image signature image signature image

    Punisher99

  • After sleeping through an exam at msu, I had an athletic trainer write me a note in order to be able to re-take the exam (prof required it). He said the "ear ache" excuse works every time. It's rare that somebody makes up having a terrible ear ache.

    Although the diarrhea excuse is pretty good. Or you can use the excuse that every chick uses multiple times a year... "I have a migraine".

    Wade Garrett

  • Punisher99 said...

    Well if I were him I'd ask me why you were questioning me about calling in.

    Drives me nuts. I'm allotted three sick days a year. I shouldn't have to tell you whats wrong with me.

    Thanks for assuming & telling me how the conversation went....

    When did I say that he called in & told me he was sick? Reading comprehension ya dunce.

    He could have been taking a sick day, personal day or vacation day. So, w/o him telling me which he was taking, I asked why. Calm down bro.

    The Only Colors

  • Punisher99 said...

    Well if I were him I'd ask me why you were questioning me about calling in.

    Drives me nuts. I'm allotted three sick days a year. I shouldn't have to tell you whats wrong with me.

    I always ask my employees why. Its more of an accounting/payroll thing (sick pay, death in family, personal day etc).

    I am in operations so its a struggle when people call out. If its employees that I am really close with, I'll occasionaly give them a hard time if its a lame excuse.

    I must say, the "irratable bowel" thing works. I had one guy call two months ago and said he was sick and couldn't make it. He said he was in his car and almost to work, but he won't be in. I said "well if your already here, why not stay?". His response, "boss, I've been shitting water for 4 straight hours".

    Can't really argue with that.

    signature image

    Holdensheroes

  • The Doctor said...

    Tumorsyphilisitisosis.

    Sounds sexy...

    "When I was in school they told me practice makes perfect. Then they told me nobody's perfect. So I stopped practicing." --Steven Wright

    Kzoo_Spartan

  • Stigmata

    signature image signature image signature image

    SpartanGrad99

  • Also, sprayed by a skunk seems fool-proof.

    signature image signature image signature image

    SpartanGrad99

  • My favorite---I have a vision problem. I can't see myself coming into work today.

    JackPineSavage ●

  • Count gHostula said...

    I just feel compelled to create an outlandish but believable story for some reason

    lol

    Bravo, my good sir.

    NigelUno

  • JackPineSavage said...

    My favorite---I have a vision problem. I can't see myself coming into work today.

    anal-glaucoma........just cant see my ass coming to work today

    duffy munn

  • Sorry to be the voice of reason in this thread of terrible comedy, but you should just say "I need to use a sick day" but you better be sick.

    I have had the company hire private investigators when I knew someone was going to call in and they did. (I heard them telling another employee that since I didnt approve their time off, they were going to call in sick)

    The "spy" sat outside their house all day just to make sure they didnt leave for the vacation they were going on. Unfortunately, I think the dude left Thursday night because the PI said that there was nothing going on at the house.

    It was such a stupid and a-hole thing to do on my part, but when you supervise union employees and they know that you cant do anything to them, you do what you can to get the upper hand.

    Sparty2QP ●

  • Sparty2QP said...

    Sorry to be the voice of reason in this thread of terrible comedy, but you should just say "I need to use a sick day" but you better be sick.

    I have had the company hire private investigators when I knew someone was going to call in and they did. (I heard them telling another employee that since I didnt approve their time off, they were going to call in sick)

    The "spy" sat outside their house all day just to make sure they didnt leave for the vacation they were going on. Unfortunately, I think the dude left Thursday night because the PI said that there was nothing going on at the house.

    It was such a stupid and a-hole thing to do on my part, but when you supervise union employees and they know that you cant do anything to them, you do what you can to get the upper hand.

    That seems like a colossal waste of time and money. Union workers are experts at this shit, as you found out. You should just be glad he actually acknowledge he wasn't at work that day, instead of having someone punch in for him.

    Rodeo Burger

  • Rodeo Burger said...

    That seems like a colossal waste of time and money. Union workers are experts at this shit, as you found out. You should just be glad he actually acknowledge he wasn't at work that day, instead of having someone punch in for him.

    Fortunately, I ran a small niche shop in a huge company. I only had 14 union employees, each with a specific assigned task, so if he had someone else punch in for him, I would have caught it. We were way behind in our work, otherwise I would have let him take the day unpaid. He didn't even ask. Buy when I heard him tell another employee that he knew I wouldnt approve unpaid so he was going to call in sick, I had to hire the PI. It only hit my budget like $200, so it was worth it.

    I will also tell you that this guy was the steward, so he was always in my office making excuses for employees who got in trouble.

    Sparty2QP ●

  • The Only Colors said...

    Thanks for assuming & telling me how the conversation went....

    When did I say that he called in & told me he was sick? Reading comprehension ya dunce.

    He could have been taking a sick day, personal day or vacation day. So, w/o him telling me which he was taking, I asked why. Calm down bro.

    Haha I'm totally calm. You said he called in and you asked why I assumed you were asking him why he couldn't make it. If you asked him if he was using a vacation, sick or personal day that's a totally different story.

    signature image signature image signature image

    Punisher99

  • Sparty2QP said...

    Sorry to be the voice of reason in this thread of terrible comedy, but you should just say "I need to use a sick day" but you better be sick.

    I have had the company hire private investigators when I knew someone was going to call in and they did. (I heard them telling another employee that since I didnt approve their time off, they were going to call in sick)

    The "spy" sat outside their house all day just to make sure they didnt leave for the vacation they were going on. Unfortunately, I think the dude left Thursday night because the PI said that there was nothing going on at the house.

    It was such a stupid and a-hole thing to do on my part, but when you supervise union employees and they know that you cant do anything to them, you do what you can to get the upper hand.

    Incredible

    signature image signature image signature image

    Punisher99

  • Once had an employee call In sick then my wife saw her a few hours larer at meijer with her boyfriend (the employees boyfriend to clarify) in the liquor isle she buying liquor...

    Not very convincing. She was not with our company for much long after that

    xwing

  • I had to call in once because my house was surrounded by a SWAT team. While true, I still took pictures to verify it when I did go to work.

    Prior Planning Prevents Poor Performance

    StylesGShmooth

  • Let's just say I was eating broasted vagina for dinner that night.

    Stains

  • StylesGShmooth said...

    I had to call in once because my house was surrounded by a SWAT team. While true, I still took pictures to verify it when I did go to work.

    Details? Multi-unit house? Mistake? Bad roommate?

    Rodeo Burger

  • Rodeo Burger said...

    Details? Multi-unit house? Mistake? Bad roommate?

    Actually it was Sparty2QP's house. We had a crazy neighbor. SWAT came for him on multiple occasions. Houses were really close. They were in our yard and wanted to set up a command post in our garage. The guy in the back yard was there to make sure I didn't try to go outside though, which I guess would've put me in the danger zone.

    Prior Planning Prevents Poor Performance

    StylesGShmooth

  • Tell your boss you can't wait to have breakfast in bed when you wake up Friday morning.

    Call in and tell him you burned your foot on the George Foreman.

    Denim Chicken

  • allergic reaction to dihydrogen monoxide

    Sparty417

  • Hello boss? This is tanny. I got banned again by sparty rocky for suggesting another poster was a "vag" on a message board for hiding behind a different username. I'm so distraught I can't concentrate or focus.

    Boss: really. You got banned for that?

    Tanny: yup.

    Boss: I completely understand.

    Lol.

    Keeping the sunshiners in check since 2000.

    Tanfan ●

  • Your meth lab exploded.

    Spartans ATTACK

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